Love Mommy

Dear Connor,

You are growing into childhood and as you linger on to toddler-hood I can't help but smile. You are at this fun age where you make me laugh constantly with the things that come out of your mouth. Sometimes you surprise me with how much you know. You still are independent and I must say I am so grateful for that nature, especially recently. I have needed a lot of help lately (due to pregnancy sickness) and have been spending too much time on the couch. But you are only too willing to put on movies or get snacks and toys for sister. But as much as I love that independent drive in you, I miss kissing your boo-boo's and holding you close to make your pain go away. You'd rather run in a corner and deal with the pain inwardly, with stifled words of "I'm okay" or "I need privacy" in a mantra type tone. But I like that your so strong and brave all the same. 


I will take a minute to brag about you too, in reference to potty training. I have been so impressed with you. From the beginning you wanted to do everything on your own and still do, I rarely have to help you and I have been so grateful for the relatively easy transition you have made.You are happiest when your busy being active. You yearn for that sport outlet I hope we can give you someday soon. When your at home 90% of the time your throwing yourself onto all the furniture, jumping off it, or climbing up to the tip top. 

I also am amazed by your love for your sister. Yes, you have your tantrums or fights where Bella and you need your own space. But as you ask for Bella to come with you to preschool, "Is she not big enough yet?", you make me grin a little with love for your big heart. I see hugs all day from you two, and you ask to snuggle with Bella every time she's sleepy. It is all the little things right down to your protective big brother nature when Bella is in harms way, that makes me love your love so. 
You are still your Daddy's best friend and you want to be just like him (school, work or play). And you always run to Daddy in the mornings with "I forgot to give you your kisses... and your hugs", not to mention your huge running start hugs when he gets home. Daddy is SO close to finishing this stage of "school/part-time work life" that all the little things you do make every day a little easier for Daddy to get through knowing how much you love him and miss him when he is gone. Mommy gets a little jealous sometimes but mostly it just makes me smile watching father and son. I remember one time in particular that made me laugh. Daddy decided to make Mommy's bourbon chicken recipe for dinner (I have made it a bunch of times and the kids wont touch the meat), but Daddy makes it and forgot about stirring it and it burned... BAD! Black chicken. But he salvaged some of it for Mommy to eat. The kids begged for the "meat", so Shea gave them some of the black chicken with their rice, and they devoured it and wanted seconds. I laughed so hard. I couldn't believe it. What little sillies. Connor went on to say how much he loved it and how Daddy did a really good cooking job, "mmmm TASTY" is what we heard all night. 

I remember reading the words from Shel Silverstein as a kid and loving them, there is one little quote I ran across recently that made me think of you ...

“Listen to the mustn’ts, child. Listen to the don’ts. Listen to the shouldn’ts, the impossibles, the won’ts. Listen to the never haves, then listen close to me … Anything can happen, child. Anything can be.” (A classic quote from Shel Silverstein’s “Where the Sidewalk Ends.”)
I can see the big dreams in your eyes. I hope they continue forever. Because your love and determination sure makes me think you can do anything, anything you set your heart on. I hope to inspire that in you forever, as you encounter all the adversary has set out for you. Sometimes the only thing that can keep us from falling into the traps the adversary has set for us is to remember that with the Lord anything can be made possible. 

I love you Connor and I see so much light in you it makes me swell with pride. And my favorite words you say are the out of the blue "I love you"'s.  


Love,

Mommy