One Day Late

PIPER's BIRTH STORY

February 14th, my due date, came and went.
I was officially 40 weeks. My body ached and seemed to be in more pain daily (in fact that very day baby was kicking so low she was stopping me to breathe through the sharp pains, I joked with Shea that she was clawing her way out and may break my water if we're lucky). How much longer could this go on for? I knew it wouldn't last forever but I couldn't help feeling as if it would.
I went to bed that night perfectly distracted by a fun Valentine's Day, but dreading the days and possibly week ahead that may or may not bring baby.

February 15th, one day late.
6:45 AM
In the middle of the night I felt a pop inside, like a knuckle popping around my belly or a rubber band snap. It was weird. And following it I felt a gush. I was still a little out of it but wanted so badly for this to be it! I couldn't help but think my water was leaking. I got up to go to the bathroom, and made it just inside the door when I large gush came and soaked me and left me shouting
"SHEA MY WATER BROKE, MY WATER BROKE SHEA! THIS IS IT!"
I continued to have small gushes as I spoke to Shea, my Mom, and Connor who had awoken to my excited shout. I took a shower immediately and tried to get ready with a towel between my legs. I felt so frustrated that I had totally rebelled against cleaning or keeping up on things in case of baby's arrival. Everything seemed a mess around the house and I was in no position to do anything.

7:30 AM
My Mom and brother Joseph came to watch the kids as Shea rushed to repack the car and throw the car seat back in. Shea insisted we grab some breakfast and immediately drove to Panera to get bagels, while I called the Hospital to notify them I was on my way and then called my Doctor's office (which didn't answer so I left a message).

8:00 AM

We arrived at the hospital and were immediately taken to Labor and Delivery (instead of waiting in Triage, which is routine). But considering I mentioned my water was leaking onto the floor they decided that Triage, to check to make sure if I was in labor, was unnecessary. I began the registration process and was all hooked up, and my IV was put in again and again and again and finally again. Apparently they had just switched to new IVs and no one new how to do them so they kept blowing my veins up. So I was bruised, bloody, sore and swollen all over my arms (for about a week).

9:00 AM
My Nurse, Regina, is so sweet. She is super chatty and excited for us. I'm forgetting my last experience here already. She checks me and I'm 2 cm, 60% effaced, posterior, -3 station, but have a very soft cervix. I'm honestly a little surprised and dissapointed that I'm not dilated more but either way there is progress and my waters broken so  baby's on her way no matter what and due to my soft cervix I won't have to worry about the cervical ripening agent!
My nurse does say she's not totally convinced I'm ruptured, but I'm not worried because I know I am. The gushing has stopped though so I'm not surprised she's uncertain because she hasn't seen proof yet. Shea worries a little it's a false alarm, but I assure him it will only be a matter of time before she's convinced.

9:30 AM
My antibiotics are administered, at my induction I had Penicillin that burned horrible going in so I had to have an extremely slow dose to prevent the awful burn, this time though my nurse gave me Ampicillin, she said it's way better, quicker and doesn't hurt. She doesn't know why they use Penicillin any more.

9:45 AM
My water gushes again for the first time since I got to my room. I call the nurse and let her know so she can do a puddle test. I also have to go to the bathroom, as she helps me up my water leaks everywhere, continually till I get back in bed. That's the last of my waters I feel all day.

10:00 AM
Dr Peterson, the on call Dr comes in to check on me and asks if it's okay to start Pitocin considering my contractions seem irregular currently.

10:30 AM

Pitocin is put in my IV. I call my Mom and get an update on the kids (Bella apparently is having a baby too), and then Shea and I start a game of Phase 10. My contractions immediately pick up and get pretty uncomfortable,

11:45 AM
As my contractions get more and more uncomfortable, I start to worry about getting the Epidural. So I decide to ask for the Epidural now even though they aren't super painful yet.

12:10 PM
My contractions are now stop to breathe through uncomfortable ones but if I concentrate hard I can still talk during them.
As I get set up for the Epidural I notice I'm sitting on the crack of the bed so I'm off center leaning more to the right, I let them know but they aren't too worried, until after. Then the anesthesiologist stays for awhile watching and waiting for my Epidural to take affect, it immediately hits my right side and my left side gets tingly. Then my blood pressure dips and she gives me a pressure medicine in my IV which sends my heart racing, but quickly solves the issue. My left leg is increasingly tingly but my right sides completely dead. They insert the Catheter cautiously, but there's no pain so the anesthesiologist calls it good and leaves.
My nurse checks me again; 4 cm, 80% effaced, mid position, -1 station. Things are progressing I'm so relieved and feel so happy!

1:30 PM
I get a new nurse, Meridith. She's fine, very monotone and blah though.  My second dose of antibiotics is given and she increases my Pitocin.

1:50 PM

We are continuing our Phase 10 game when a bunch of nurses and Dr Peterson all come in at once. I'm thinking it's delivery time already!?! But it turns out it is a heart rate scare. I'm immediately checked; 4 cm, 80% effaced, cervix front, -1 station.
Baby's heart rate has dipped for a few minutes (150's to 50's), my stomach is really hard and their all worried about baby. Fortunately baby's heart rate immediately starts to go up as they put Oxygen on me, pump my IV with with pressure medication, turn my Pitocin off, and roll me from side to side, while pushing on my belly. If baby's heart rate didn't go up after a few minutes of intervention they were prepared to do an Emergency C-Section.
My nurse warns me if it happens again I should start mentally preparing for a C-Section (4/5 mins of low heartbeat and they immediately do a C-Section within 10 minutes). She explains that the reason for baby's heart rate dipping is because baby's in distress, due to the two long contractions that came one on top of each other not giving her much time to relax in between.

2:00 PM
My Pitocin is left off permanently and my stomach softens up. I'm moved to my right side. Baby's heart rate continues to go up and everyone leaves. Shea makes a quick run to get some lunch. I watch the baby's heart rate intently. I'm so scared of a C-Section. And especially of everything happening so fast that Shea wouldn't be there. But he arrives back fairly quickly.

2:30 PM
My nurse comes in and rolls me to my left side. I'm consistently contracting on my own now every 2-3 minutes or less. I can feel them sort of on my left side. Not painful though.

2:40 PM
Baby makes a large movement and the fetal monitor is moved all around.
Her heart rate dips down again.
Nurse comes in and changes my position immediately, baby's heart rate goes up at once and she checks me; loose 6.5-7cm, 100% effaced, -1 station, Front and center cervix.
Another nurse comes in as well so they can move baby and me around, as well as the monitors.
They think she's rolling on her cord. I ask it the cord could be wrapped around her back or body, and they remark that it's definitely a possibility.
My nurse goes over the C-Section routine. What shots I'll get how quickly I'll be prepped, everything that will happen just in case. My nurse leaves.
I freak out a little to Shea. But we reassure each other that if baby is in trouble and it comes to a C-Section then we will gladly take it.
Shea gives me a quick blessing of comfort.
My nurse returns quickly and continues to monitor me.

3:00 PM
She checks me again, I'm 9 cm.

3:10
My nurse checks me again. Fully dilated. The room gets set up and within a few minutes another nurse comes in and I started preliminary pushing to get baby down and in position. The oxygen I'm breathing is extremely hard to breathe through while pushing but I manage. And Shea helps me put it on in between pushing when I rip it off. He is a huge coach and supporter during everything I can tell he's trying so hard! Baby is stuck at my pelvic bone though and seems to be face up. My head feels like it is bursting and I am seriously worried about popping an eye vessel in the process. And the nurse remarks that baby is stretched out really far, because she is kicking my ribs so HARD when I push. Everyone keeps telling me I am working so hard and that she is just a bugger, I KNOW! It also doesn't help that my epidural is increasingly less effective, nothing PAIN burdening but increasingly uncomfortable. I hit the epidural button somewhere in the middle of pushing but it doesn't do much.
Finally she turns, baby is crowning. Dr Peterson is called.

4:10 PM
Dr Peterson comes in. I start the real pushing! I'm feeling contractions and the urge to push more and more but fortunately the epidural takes the edge off so it never really gets painful. While I push she asks me, do I still want more after all this? (I'm guessing because of the long pushing period), and I remember just looking up at Shea with a big smile and saying YES! 
Looking back it was totally a weird question to ask me at the time, but for me it kinda gave me a serious amount of energy and love for birth.

4:20 PM

Piper Scarlet Stanger is born!

7 lbs 7 oz, 20 inches

The cord was wrapped around her neck once, but it was fairly loose. She's perfect! She is mine! I do skin to skin for an hour as they recommend. Shea is so jealous. Her eyes are open the whole time, everyone remarks on how alert she is. (Her Apgar score was 8 at 1 min, 9 at 5 mins.) 

After skin to skin they take her stats; weight 7 lbs 7 oz, height 20 inches.

Then we get moved to recovery. Which was much more cozy and the nurses all seem a little more baby and mommy doting, which I love. 
Once settled it's already around 7 pm and we opt to Facetime tonight and have everyone visit tomorrow instead. Connor was totally enthralled and did struggle HUGELY with not getting to see Baby and Me in person. But he was a champ and pulled it together at the end. 
Piper slept great that night and we loved talking and Facetiming family that night (and throughout the stay) to show off our beautiful new baby girl. 
I also had a ton of yogurt, which I normally hate but was all they had and tasted so good I just ate it every time they brought me meds or  asked if I needed anything. Finally they got the idea to just bring one every time they came in.

The next day Connor didn't have school, which worked out great so we could have them visit right away (visitors are allowed at 12pm). Shea grabbed them and Mcd's and headed over so we could all have lunch and visit. 

 

If you can't tell the kids were ecstatic and completely in awe of baby. Every one of the kids wanted Mommy time and I loved snuggling them and telling them about Piper. 

Of course they were all CRAZY too; running, screaming, giggling, shouting, etc. but no tantrums though! 

When they left though it did feel nice to breath. I was a little sad things hadn't gone smoother and calmer and no one had an interest in a family picture, but everyone was happy so that left me happy too. 

In terms of my recovery it has all been relatively quick, I was up and moving around pretty good by day two (little by little). So Shea went home to take the kids off my Mom's hands and spend the night with them. But boy did he not want to leave.

And of course when he did leave our perfect angel babe wasn't too happy. She seriously had me up all night till 5:55 am. The nurses helped some but FMH (Frederick Memorial Hospital), does a step down nursery which of course meant this exhausted mama didn't get a break. I was seriously praying for a full straight 30 mins. I got maybe 2 hrs somewhere in the mix. And yes I survived. But missed Shea terribly. 

At 6 am rounds started and along with vitals Piper passed her hearing and cardiac tests beautifully. My nurse then started the discharge while I tried to sleep a little (Piper was finally out!)

After dropping Con at school and the girls with my Mom, he showed up around 9:45 ish. And as I showered and got ready, he got Piper ready to leave as well.

For some reason the postpartum blues hit me on the way home from the hospital every time. To ease it all we went out for brunch (I know with our not even 2 day old newborn, we are terrible). But it was kinda great. 
Now we are all home and I'm taking it slow and getting spoiled by Shea (like I literally sleep half the day, while he runs the house) but either way we're all doing great!

WELCOME TO THE WORLD

Piper Scarlet Stanger

Born February 15th of 2016 at 4:20 pm

Weighing 7 lbs 7 oz, 20 inches long

Mom and baby are doing well, and we are all perfectly smitten.

It Just Wasn't Time

My induction came and went.

My body and Piper's body it seems aren't quite ready to let go of this special bond we share. So we shall wait.

It was all a little heart wrenching to think we were going to be taking home our baby girl and to feel so prepared, and then as hours go by to feel so helpless and hopeless, and eventually to go home without her. It tore both, Shea and I, apart just a little.

Wednesday, Feb 10th

The day began with excitement, every little detail carefully thought out. Connors lunches were prepped, the house was cleaned every inch I could reach, outfits were laid out, schedules were made, infant car seat was installed, bags were packed, a family IHOP breakfast was had, goodbyes were made.

And to the hospital we went, we had called at 6 am and were told to come at 8 am then 8:30 am. So after kids were dropped off we eagerly began our baby's birth day, or so we thought.

39 Weeks, 3 Days

8:30 am
Check-in.
A nurse comes in and says she reviewed my history and that she was ready to have this baby in no time.
We go through the registration process.

10:30 am
My first installment of antibiotics is started.
I'm checked; 2.5 cm, 40% effaced, posterior cervix, thick, and baby's in -3 station.
Dr Mihn tried stripping my membranes, but apparently she was only able to do it a little because my cervix is so posterior, it's too hard to reach.
She recommends I start Cytotec/ Misoprostol. My cervix is not soft enough for Pitocin. So I need a cervical ripening agent. At my last appointment she gave me a sheet on induction medicines and told me to research Misoprostol in particular since it's not FDA approved for induction. This scared us a little so we looked up only this drug from the list and found google horror stories so elected not to use it and jumped to the next option. Cervadil.

11:00 am
Cervadil is inserted. We are told it sometimes initiates labor but it's primary goal is to soften the cervix for Pitocin. Everyone seems frustrated we didn't chose Cytotec but we feel confident that since my labors are fast things will be initiated quickly and that soon enough baby will be in our arms.
At this time it's noticed that baby is hard to monitor, because she's so active.

11:30 am
I have my above all favorite nurse of the day, Terri. She let's me know the contractions are pretty strong and fairly regular, and she jokes that baby better let us get the second dose of antibiotics in. She also tells me that whenever I start feeling really uncomfortable or I'm getting more regular intense contractions, to let her know and I'll get checked. She also says my uterus looks irritated, so that's a good sign and means I'll be more likely to go right into labor.
Nurse Terri was so nice and positive and upbeat and happy, she loved talking to us.

1:30 pm
My nurse switched to Nurse Jen. Which was quite the different experience and everything seemed to go downhill from there. I noticed my contractions were uncomfortable and regular so I asked if I could get checked when they do my next antibiotic dose. But Nurse Jen tells us I'm just crampy and the Cervadil will be in the full 12 hrs before anything else is done or I'm checked, because my Cervix was extremely unfavorable.
Not too happy with the Dr at this point because I am feeling pretty stupid at this point, because I didn't even know I was unfavorable let alone extremely so. There doesn't seem to be a lot of communication considering at my Dr appt last week I seemed to be a good induction candidate and now... I'm told it's all subjective. So as I discuss it with the nurse I get very frustrated, it seems like baby girl won't be coming for many more hours and there is nothing to do but wait and hope for progress.

It also seems as if baby is stuck in one spot which is making it very hard to monitor her heart rate correctly, she seems to like this little nook on my right side tucked in my hip bone. Not super comfortable for either of us I'm sure.

2:30 pm
My second dose of antibiotics goes in. And my nurse offers me lunch. At this point it's hard not to be humiliated. Considering food isn't allowed in labor and delivery but Nurse Jen assures me I can eat because there's no way I'm going into actual labor anytime soon. I feel so depressed and hopeless, and it doesn't help that I'm extremely uncomfortable and feeling contractions regularly just not intense enough ones to merit anything, "cramps" I guess...
And the fetal monitors are on so tight  because baby is so hard to monitor that it hurts constantly.

3:00 pm
I can't get myself to eat my pity food so the nurse takes it back, Shea lovingly and positively insists on getting me a little something. I'm starving so I consent to a bagel. Or maybe two, I'm starving!!!
I'm also told that there would be a Dr switch at 6 pm. I'm pretty excited because it's my Dr I scheduled the inducement with. I'm sure she will be more positive and happy for me and kick things into action. Maybe have a new plan or check me or start me on Pitocin or break my water or something. My contractions seem like they are getting more intense here and there so I'm sure something is happening!

6 pm
Dr Thomas came on, I was told earlier she would come see me but after a half hr I ask and apparently my nurse saw her and just told her everything and she met with my previous Dr, and so seeing me didn't really matter.
Extremely frustrating because now I'm losing any positivity and can't help but just lose it a little but Shea does amazing staying happy and upbeat even through my tears.
We're left feeling baby won't come till the wee hrs of the morning. We are so anxious!

6:30 pm
My next set of antibiotics is administered. I have to get them every 4 hrs now. My nurse sees my contractions are still regular and says hopefully they are doing something nonchalantly and gives me a half smile that maybe they will intensify.
Dr Thomas comes in and is happy and upbeat but doesn't seem to think much is happening. She discusses the plan either way after the Cervadil is taken out at 11 pm. If it's soft obviously we start pitocin, if not we talk options; Cytotec, trying pitocin anyway. She seems sure we will have this baby before she leaves tomorrow afternoon.
After my Dr leaves I can't help but feel even more defeated. Talking options if Cervadil didn't do anything... I was certain all these contractions all day did something. And Shea and I were too stubborn now to start that other drug.

7 pm

Watching contractions, waiting, wanting. 

I get a new nurse. Mean nurse. I'm left with her for the rest of the night. She comes in right after the Dr leaves and seems annoyed that the Dr didn't talk with her and bombards me with negativity and makes me feel like I'm wasting everyone's time by not taking Cytotec originally. And wants to know the plan WHEN Cervadil doesn't work! She pushes me to consider going home. By this time I let myself cry it out and push on hoping please that everyone's wrong and that this Cervadil will have worked!

10:30 pm
Antibiotics are administered once again. Contractions seem to be getting more irregular and nurse goes over all the signs that nothing's progressing. I'm also told by my nurse that she will check me at 11 because Dr Thomas is gone. Then she will call her to discuss my options.
After she leaves I lose it, everyone's given up on us. And Shea and I are starting to lose hope and are heavily considering going home. I'm exhausted and completely sore and destroyed emotionally, mentally and physically.

11 pm
I'm checked. No progress. 2 cm, 30% effaced, possibly -2 station, still
thick posterior cervix though. Subjective subjective subjective it's all subjective but I can't help but feel like I'm going backwards even though it really just means no progress.
I give up completely. Shea and I both lose it a little, he really wants to push through but he understands how spent I am and we decide to go home after an attempt at pitocin.

11:30 pm
Reluctantly my nurse gives me Pitocin even though she thinks it wont work. In 3 hrs I decide I'll get checked and go home, if nothing is happening.

2:30 am
The time has gone by steadily. I'm checked. No progress.
I could have continued for hrs on a low dose of pitocin but the artificial contractions seemed to be doing nothing but causing me discomfort. And I wanted to avoid a c-section at all costs, and I knew pitocin would end in that if no progress continued.
So we decide to go home. Nurse says we have to wait an hour per Dr request (originally Dr requested 5 hrs, but nurse says she talked her down). Dr wanted to make sure I wouldn't go straight into active labor.
My nurse has no confidence of anything happening naturally so c-section may be my only option if it comes to it. Some babies just don't want to come, she says.

3:30 am

Discharged. Overcome with a feeling of freedom, relief, exhaustion, and gratitude that our baby is healthy and happy and I am healthy as well. We are leaving the hospital with a perfectly content little girl, just not quite in our arms yet. I was so grateful for the spirit to comfort me right then as we left I felt a great sense of relief leaving, which was weird, but felt good. It was so negative there and all I could think of is my nice comfy bed and being free of all the cords, IVs and monitors.
Shea admitted he struggled on the way home though. It had been a long and hard day for him too. Not physically but emotionally draining and he had kept a happy face for me through it all. I needed that.

4 am
We snuggled in bed and Shea held me tight. It was a long day.

Thursday

I felt subdued by the whole experience not really feeling much and trying hard to avoid thinking of it all. Although I couldn't help but feel like I never wanted to go back and I'd rather keep this baby in forever so that I never have to go through it all again or see anyone again.
My body is healing now from yesterday. So that when it is time I'll be ready.
Shea lovingly is taking care of me and I feel like he's having to nurse me back to happy prego mode again. He scheduled my Dr appt for me, I couldn't bring myself to do it, it's for Tuesday at 1:40 pm.
Honestly I'd like to wait and just let her come on her own or wait till I'm 41+ wks, because of the horrible humiliation and negative attitude I felt bombarded me in the hospital. It's hard to think I can feel anything but that defeat now. But we will probably set up another inducement, ASAP.
All in all it's hard because I am gbs positive and worry about receiving antibiotics for baby. And I would greatly prefer an epidural over an unmedicated birth. So inducement seems ideal.
But I don't know if I can make it through another day like yesterday, if she doesn't come on her own.

Ideally I'd rather my water breaks but gives me plenty of time for drugs. Then I lack the humiliation of another induction or Dr appt or hospital stay of no progression, no progression, no progression. Not likely but not sure what else to hope for. I don't trust contractions since I have had so many and they have done nothing.

I also read this article online which brought me a little perspective and comfort.
"women who fail to go into active labor after an induction are told that their bodies do not function correctly. But think of it in terms of trying to peel back the petals of a flower before it's ready to bloom. If it's JUST about to bloom, you may have some success with opening the flower. But if it's not ready yet, the petals are just going to fall off and you'll have a ruined flower. It's the same with trying to induce a baby who's not ready, in a body that is not ripe."
Forcing an induction may ruin the birthing experience in its essence, a forced induction can often be a domino affect leading to many chemical applications that lead to a c-section in many cases. If this experience has taught me anything it is that I need to be less impatient and more comfortable with waiting until baby and I are ready. I am not anti-induction just anti an unfavorable one.

If anything I've learned that I will always ask for all the information before an induction. I want to make sure I am a favorable candidate for induction and that I don't need cervical ripening agents. I conducted my Bishop score (which I read about online after the whole ordeal ); which is made up of Cervical dilation, Cervical effacement, Cervical consistency, Cervical position, and Fetal station. And I would be only a 2. I wish I had known before how unfavorable I was so I could have made a more accurate decision on getting an inducement. Not to say that I'd never get induced again or that I wouldn't consider Cytotec now after reading that it actually is just as risky as pitocin or anything else. I'd just rather not be induced unless I'm a favorable candidate.

39 Weeks

Pregnancy Update:

Well I am officially 39.5 weeks pregnant and we are about to meet our sweet new baby girl. This week has probably been the longest of my life. We have all been so antsy and anxious, I think even the kids are feeling it. Not to mention Shea and I have been a little on edge as we try hard to make the time pass. I've also been having a few nights of panic and nerves that keep me pretty restless. Shea has been a huge support trying hard to calm my nerves and find solutions to all my fears.

"PIPER!"

Considering I have to call in the morning at 6 AM for my 7 AM induction, I kept having thoughts of getting bumped or pushed back by hours or days. So lets hope that is not that case. Then my thoughts were overrun with way too much internet researching that worries me about how long it will take if I don't progress much or any further by the inducement.

All my labors have been relatively fast in the past but I have about the least amount of progression ever before, at the 39 week point. Which I know, I know could mean I could go any second or wait another few weeks for her to come on her own. I just am literally praying that my induction takes and that everything goes quickly and smoothly and that the epidural gets placed in plenty of time correctly and that after the epidural my labor doesn't halt. So many worries, so many prayers it is all a little nerve rattling at this point. Poor Shea is the only one that truly understands (well as much as he can); considering he knows how on the verge of tears I am due to hormones and how frustrated I am due to the lack of progression, and scared I am due to the delivery experience I had with Sydney.

Fortunately I listened, and after calling my doctor's office I found out I was not only 2 cm last week but 50% effaced and as I assumed baby was at a -3 station, so very high. It was a huge relief hearing about my effacement because from everything I've read it is effacement that directly affects the induction. And 0% effacement means the induction could last several days. Considering I originally thought I was 0% you can see why I was fearful for my induction coming up. Now I am feeling a lot better and of course hoping for even more progress the day of, so that everything goes as planned.

I'll be honest I am pretty excited to get on my way to recovery and have my own body/belly back because as Sydney likes to remind me as she lifts my shirt and say "eww" I am kind of over the big belly phase. At least Sydney also reminds me how special this all is as she says "soft" as she rubs my skin and then her face lights up in her shocked little "wow" face as Piper kicks. None of the kids fully understand all this baby belly talk but I am in love with their excitement for Piper.

We've talked lots about baby, about Piper about being soft and gentle, about helping lots, about baby crying, and about us doing our best to be quiet. Sydney is ready for "baby", Connor is ready for Piper Diaper (thank you Shea for the nicknames already) and Connor's new nickname for her Piper Scooper ("like pooper scooper but piper"... oh boy), Bella is ready to be a mama to her daughter (she keeps telling me Piper is her daughter and she's going to be a great mama and I can help). It is kind of all adorable and makes the anticipation grow and grow.

Wish me luck, she is on her way soon! Or at least that is what everyone tells me.

38 Weeks

Pregnancy Update:

Lately I'm having increased skin ailments, which have definitely plagued me this pregnancy more than any other. Acne, itching, skin tags, rashes; mostly on my neck !?!? Can't wait to have that be back to normal.
I'm keeping hydrated and loving ICE, it is my favorite snack all the time!
Piper's movements are getting lower and lower and more painful, as she does her best to grow inside this ever shrinking space..
A few nights lately I've been up with bad cramping and thoughts of "Could this be it?" but obviously it hasn't amounted to much. Just Piper playing tricks on me and making my nights as restless as possible.
Shea's getting so excited. He keeps trying to pressure Piper to come :)
Nowadays I'm enjoying the thought of preparing for after delivery, and days of loose comfy clothes, my feet not aching when I walk, and holding my brand new girl. I know I'll be bombarded with a whole new set of woes but there is just something about that little baby that makes it all worth it.

Wednesday, HOSPITAL TOUR/ DATE NIGHT: This week we took a hospital tour at FMH it was really interesting and a good experience it helped me and Shea feel more prepared and comfortable with where and how things are going to work while delivering and recovering here. I wish I was able to enjoy it more though. I started having false labor contractions throughout it, and couldn't really focus so I  found myself quizzing Shea in the car for all the material I had missed. Thank goodness he was paying attention. Then we went off to dinner where my "contractions" continued. Irregularly. After a quick dinner we started thinking this is it so we ran over to Target for a few last minute things and then headed home. We warned my Mom this might be it. And I ran around the house getting things in place for the chance we'd be leaving for the hospital that night. I finally tried to go to sleep with my "contractions" seemingly dissipating, but then woke to them a few hours later in full force, I timed them and although they hadn't intensified they seemed regular. Unfortunately an hour later they broke again and spaced out and ended altogether. Probably the most frustrating night of my life.

Doctor Update:
At the doctor I was extremely frustrated. After having a rough week of discomfort, especially Monday and Wednesday (which we were SO CLOSE to making a trip to the hospital for), I was sure I'd have something to show for it. But alas a measly 2 cm and soft but not thinned cervix was all I had to show for it, and again baby was sitting high. Child what are you doing to me? Probably the biggest letdown I've ever had. I mean to go from thinking we are headed to Labor and Delivery the night before to sitting in the Dr's office with nothing to show for it. I've decided from here on out I'm ignoring any form of contraction like feeling, so unless my water breaks we will be induced. The hardest part is feeling grounded and stable and happy for that inducement to have all the excitement of a false labor rip all that stability away. Now I'm just left with impatience and frustration. Not only do I feel huge and slow and weak but the hardest part is feeling like it's never going to end. Hopefully in the next couple days I can work myself back into grounding myself so I can survive these last few days.